Fathers and Sons
by KissHerJack
Summary: All the real "ANSWERS" to the questions asked in the "Everything Rose Wanted to Know about Time Lords..." mini-series. UNSEEN AND IN BETWEEN Series - post FEAR HER
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Fathers and Sons**

Author: Gail R. Delaney

**Series: The Unseen and In Between**

Setting: After _Fear Her_

Genre: Romance, Angst

Rating: PG-13 overall

Disclaimer: Not mine. If I owned Doctor Who, Christopher Eccleston and David Tennant would be my own private little playmates.

Summary: _"I was a dad once." _He answered her questions when she asked them, but Rose still never understood what he was really said until he was ready to open the door. The final story of the man known as The Doctor is both beautiful and tragic, but the greatest beauty is in the telling.

Follow up to **Everything Rose Wanted to Know about Time Lords, and Apparently Wasn't Afraid to Ask**.

Excerpt in first section from _Tardis Lullabye_ within the **Unseen and In Between** series.

A/N: I use canon, I bend canon, I interpret canon my own way and I add just a tick of my own fanon to make it all work.

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_You're avoiding Precious Rose_.

"No, I'm not. Don't be ridiculous."

He retrieved a wire pincer from the edge of the console. Before he could pull the bundle of wires that were his intended target from beneath the console edge, a circuit sparked, sending him scrambling out again.

_Yes, you are. Yes, you are._

The Doctor scowled and stood, tossing the pincer on the console. "I am _not_. You know, I think I liked you much better before you decided that everything I say or do is open to your scrutiny."

_Precious Rose is not sleeping_.

"Thank you," he snapped. "I wondered." He didn't care if he was being rude, the TARDIS was being pushy. Had been poking and nudging at him since they'd come back from the Games.

_You're avoiding_.

"Stop it!" he shouted, his voice echoing off the convex walls of the console room.

He snatched up the spare Quadratic Emitter from the top of the console, holding it against his chest to twist the circuit cover loose. The TARDIS remained silent for a solid seven-point-three-six minutes.

_You opened the door._

"I know."

_Are you ready?_

Giving up on the emitter, he set it down and went to the jump seat, sinking heavily into the worn cushions. He scrubbed his face with his palms, groaning. "No. Yes!" he snapped out, contradicting himself. "No. Hell, I don't know."

Her scolding push softened, and he felt the TARDIS wrap around him in an embrace. He closed his eyes and let his head drop to the back of the jump seat.

_I can help. Show Clever Rose. Let her see._

"No," he said, rolling his head on the seat back. "I need to do it." The Doctor inhaled a deep breath, and felt some of the tightness in his chest release as he accepted in his head what his hearts already knew. He _did_ need to do this, but more than that, he _wanted_ to do it. He wanted Rose to know… not just anyone… Rose.

Rose woke from the uneasy, fitful sleep that had kept her tossing and turning for hours in the large, empty bed. With a heavy sigh, she slid her hands across the smooth sheets to touch his pillow. The surface was smooth, untouched by him.

She unfolded her legs and slid off the bed, picking up one of the Doctor's discarded shirts to slip over her tank. It smelled like him – spice, amber and space. Rose left the sleeves unbuttoned, rolling them until they just cleared her wrists, and wrapped the shirt around her. Barefoot, she padded across the bedroom and into the hall.

A low fire burned in the library fireplace, and a memory from what seemed like a lifetime ago, slid over her. The first night she'd found the library… and found him sitting by the fire.

_Shelves lined the walls from floor to ceiling and corner-to-corner, and books filled every available inch. Leather bound tomes four inches thick to thin paperback novels, stacked back to back. A fireplace sat on the far wall, the front face spreading at least eight feet across, with a fire glowing behind blackened metal mesh. The aroma filled the air, and wrapped around her._

_A tall-backed leather chair sat facing the fire, and if it weren't for his leg hanging over the arm, she wouldn't have known he was there._

"_You should be sleeping, Rose."_

_His voice was heavy, wrapping around her, drawing her to him. Rose crossed the space and rounded the chair to look down at him. The Doctor slouched down in the chair, his elbows on the chair arms with his fingers steepled in front of his lips. His eyes darted up, and she saw the flames of the fire reflect in them as his gaze quickly shifted over her. His leather jacket was gone, and his jumper was the beautiful dark blue one she liked on him. It brought out the color of his eyes._

"_So should you, don't you think?"_

_His eyes lowered again and he stared past her to the fire. "I don't sleep. Much."_

_Rose sat down on the wide leather ottoman in front of his chair, tucking her hands between her knees. They sat silent, listening to the crackle of the fire behind her, and Rose watched the shadow of the flames dance across his face. The Doctor lowered his arm and extended it to her, hand open and palm up. She scooted to the edge of the ottoman and covered his hand with hers, squeezing gently._

Rose stood on the staircase landing, looking down on the massive library space. The same high-back chair sat near the fire, but tonight she saw one of his white trainers extended at the end of a long leg. Rose crossed her arms over her body, tugging the shirt tighter around her, and took the right staircase down into the library.

He looked up at her as she walked around the chair, and automatically reached out his hand. Rose squeezed his long fingers and bent over to kiss him, just a short touch of lips to lips. The Doctor reached out a foot and hooked it around the leg of the nearby ottoman, dragging it closer to the big chair. Rose smiled again, feeling another wave of nostalgia. She sat in the middle of the ottoman, folding her legs in front of her.

"Hello," he said softly, and she loved the way he smiled. Genuine… happy that she had come to share his space with him.

"You plannin' on sitting up all night?"

He drew a deep breath, releasing it through his nose. "No. I was coming along soon. Just…" He finished with a shrug.

His gaze shifted down and she saw a book nestled in the space between his leg and the side of the chair, as if he'd been looking at it but shoved it there when he was done. It didn't look like a novel, some of the pages seemed spaced apart as if something with thickness was sandwiched between. Like a scrap book or photograph album. She wanted to ask what it was, but knew it would lead to more questions - and beyond "So, you were a dad once..." - which seemed too abrupt.

She looked over her shoulder at the fire, inhaling deeply of the applewood. It smelled gorgeous, infusing her with comfort and ease.

"Gwendolyn," he finally said, pulling her attention back. His voice was heavy, rough... strained. "Lorelei. And Corin. Those were their names — or, the closest translation in English I can offer. My children." He cleared his throat, but his gaze was level with hers and he didn't look away.

A weight sat in the center of Rose's chest, but she wasn't sure how to define it. Whether it was grief for him, for the pain in his eyes, or pride and gratitude that he shared their names with her. Maybe it was both.

"They're beautiful names." She swallowed hard, blinking rapidly to tamp down the sting in her eyes. "Wh-what was their mother's name?"

He drew in a breath through his open lips, the air hissing softly through his teeth and curled his fingers into the arm of the chair as he released her name. "Mara." His eyes shifted upward to look into some dark corner of the library ceiling. A single tear slid down his cheek.

But, he wasn't ready to stop and wasn't ready to take comfort. She wasn't touching him, but she'd opened her mind to him enough to sense that. Rose needed to be closer to him, so she slid across the smooth leather of the ottoman to sit near his knees. His gaze came back to her, his eyes shining with the flames from the fire.

"She wasn't a Time Lord." He shook his head. "She was Gallifreyan." He nodded, swallowing hard. "Were you married to her during your first... " She stumbled over the right word. "Your first life?"

The Doctor sniffed loudly, running his hand across his face. "Yes. We married while I was still training." He chuckled, but the humor was lost in the tone. "Wasn't the first time I'd angered the Cardinals, but I'd never seen them quite that infuriated before. I was young..." His voice crackled and his brow pulled down tight over his eyes. "So very young."

Rose reached out and took his hand, and his grip tightened on her fingers, almost desperate. She smiled, and a shuddered breath shifted through him. "Tell me about them?"

"Are you sure you want to hear?"

She nodded. "I'd be so proud if you told me."

His expression brightened, and even though his eyes still shined bright, he smiled. Still holding her hand, he stood, and drew her off the ottoman. He retrieved the book from where it had slipped between the cushions in the chair and led her to the couch. A tall light with a tasseled shade stood behind the sofa, and he reached behind them to turn it on as they sat. The glow was soft, spreading out in a circle around the space. The Doctor sat in the corner of the couch and she nestled into the space beside him. With a slightly less than steady hand, he opened the book.

She had been right. It was a photograph album, but the photographs looked so much different than the ones she was accustomed to on Earth. Digital imagery held nothing to the exquisite detail, color and depth of the images. They almost looked three-dimensional, like if she reached out to touch one her hand would slip into whatever moment had been captured.

The first picture was of a young man and woman, and if Rose had to put a human age to them, she'd say no more than their mid-twenties. His hair was so fair it appeared almost white and he was attractive in an average man sort of way. Nothing exceptional, but he was handsome. The woman was beautiful, with rich brown hair and elegant features.

"Is this you?" she asked, pointing to the image. She looked up at him, smiling... trying to see some remnants of his first face in the one he had now. The high angle of the cheekbones might be the same, but other than that, nothing else remained. "Your hair is so blonde! It's almost white."

"It turned white eventually, before I regenerated."

He turned the page and there were more photographs of them together, sometimes alone and sometimes with others. And then there was an image of Mara alone, her cheeks stained pink with embarrassment as she stood sideways, her stomach protruding with an unborn child. Rose's throat tightened as she remembered what he had told her not long ago... that this could never be a reality for them.

"She's beautiful," Rose managed to say, proud of herself that the small wave of heartache didn't come through in her voice. "You both look really, really happy."

"We were. Probably too happy. I forgot that it wouldn't last." He turned the pages again, and showed her picture after picture of his family, and as they went further into the album, the family grew.

Two girls and a boy, and in almost every picture, the children were in some state of climbing their father - the Doctor. They hung off his shoulders, or sat in his lap, or clung to his legs. One of the girls was as blonde as her father, and her curls hung down her back in long, thick ringlets. That was Gwendolyn, he told her. Lorelei had dark hair, like her mother, and brooding eyes in a pale blue. The eyes reminded her of the first face she ever loved.

"Can I ask you a question?"

His arm had slipped behind her as they both leaned over the album, and his hand stroked up her spine when he looked at her. The tension had eased around his eyes the more he talked about his family, and it no longer emanated from him like a buffer field. "Of course."

"Genetics... how does that work? If you are a different person, what, thirteen times in your life? When you... if you... have children... do they have just the DNA of that body or..."

"It's complicated, but in essence, the potential of every body I will have is engrained in me from birth. The strongest is whatever body I am in, which is probably where Gwendolyn got her hair..." He smiled, looking down at the pictures. "But, other bits can bleed through. Why?"

Rose touched the edge of the picture with Lorelei. "She has your eyes. Your previous eyes."

Corin, the only boy and the youngest, she couldn't place at all. A mass of unruly curls in bright red with dark green eyes and freckles. Rose laughed. "He has your freckles! And look... ginger. There's hope for you yet, Doctor."

He laughed and more of the painful buffer around him eased away. Rose couldn't deny the sudden urge to hug him and wrapped her arms around his neck. He didn't hesitate to hug her, holding on tight for several minutes. When she pulled away, she touched his cheek and kissed the corner of his mouth. "Tell me more?"

The Doctor smiled and nodded, focusing again on the album. "My boy was the only one to join the Academy. Because they weren't Loomed, there was no guarantee that I would pass on the necessary regeneration gene."

Rose sat now with the album open in her lap, and the Doctor looked over her shoulder to point out different things in different photos. The images progressed on until Mara was gray, and her face showed the signs of progressing age. There was some aging on the Doctor, but not to the same degree. They were surrounded by the adult versions of their children, and what appeared to be the next generation. Men now stood with Gwendolyn and Lorelei, and small children sat on the ground or in laps. Lorelei held a baby in her arms, and stood behind the Doctor, her eyes intent on her father.

Corin, now a grown man with his curls tamed but still definitely ginger, stood on the edge of the group with his expression subdued and his eyes stern. Something about the way he stood apart, and the rigidity of his body, made Rose sad. He wasn't the bright eyed, smiling boy that had clung to his father and laughed with his freckled face turned to the sun.

"That's what the Academy does to you if you let it," the Doctor explained, his voice dropping again, losing some of the lightness of moments before. "It takes the life from you. They teach you to be emotionless, to be analytical and dull. To observe, and not be involved. It killed me to see them suck him dry."

Rose watched his face as he spoke, and shook her head. "I can't see you like that. You didn't let it happen."

"Probably why I married. It was one more thing they told me I couldn't do, couldn't be... and I refused to live with a stick up my arse."

Rose snorted, trying to stifle her laughter. Such a statement coming from him seemed so out of place. He smiled, and she knew he had at least partially said it to get her to smile. She curled into him as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, and laid her forehead against the side of his throat. The album balanced now between them and Rose ran her fingertip along the family photograph. "I like this one. I think we should, I don't know, hang it or something."

"Really?"

She nodded against his skin. "Yeah. Just cuz it was a long time ago doesn't mean it shouldn't be remembered." Rose drew back so she could see his face and he turned his head to look at her. She skimmed her gaze over his features, smiling at the tiny freckles that dotted his skin. From just standing distance, they were almost unnoticeable, but this close, she loved to pick out each one. "Hang it. And maybe someday you can hang a picture of me, too."

His eyes darkened and Rose immediately regretted saying anything. It was the silent truth between them... no matter how long she stayed, someday he would not have her beside him. Tears pricked at her eyes, but before they could pool, she closed the space between their lips and kissed him — just pressing her mouth to his to keep either of them from saying anything more.

She broke free and nestled her forehead against his neck again before he saw her eyes and managed to sniffle only softly. "When did you start traveling? You didn't travel then, did you?"

His hand curled around her far shoulder and he pulled her tighter to him for just a moment before turning his attention back to the album. "After Mara died. But, I didn't exactly leave with the permission of the Council."

Rose jerked back, remembering something from his journals. "Oh, I remember! This TARDIS... you stole her. You just took her and took off with her. Why did you have to steal her?"

"I needed to leave Gallifrey for a time." He touched the image, indicating the baby in Lorelei's arms. "This is Susan. My granddaughter."

Rose giggled softly. "You're a gramp."

The Doctor beamed. "Yes, I am and proud of it. Six times over."

She shook her head. "It amazes me, it really does. Okay... so this is Susan. What's she got to do with you leaving Gallifrey?"

Tiny lines pinched at the corners of the Doctor's eyes, and she knew whatever thoughts he had were not ones he wanted. "Susan was different. She couldn't stay there... on a planet that despised her for what she was — what I'd made her to be — so, it was my responsibility to take her away." His expression hardened, his lips leveling until there was no sign of the smile moments before. "The Council denied me, and so I did it myself."

"What was she? What could she be that would make them hate her?"

His eyes slid to her, and a muscle along his jaw clenched as he ground his teeth together. Finally, he parted his lips and drew in a breath. "Susan was human."


	2. Chapter 2

"Susan was human."

As soon as the words left his lips, the Doctor stood and strode away from the couch, leaving Rose to catch her balance with the sudden shift of the seat cushions. She closed the album and set it aside, watching him as he walked to the hearth and set his elbow on the mantle, rubbing his fingers across his brow as if staving off a headache.

Rose stared hard, and realization hit her like a snap of her fingers and she sucked in a breath. A dozen little pieces of the puzzle tumbled together, like the old TETRIS game Mickey used to play. A turn here, a flip there, an off-handed comment dropped... and everything was right there for her to see.

She blinked, bringing him into focus and he watched her. With an almost apologetic expression, he nodded. "Ask it... ask your one question, Rose. I know that's all you need." His mouth tipped up in one corner. "Clever Rose."

Rose unfolded her legs from the couch cushions and stood, walking about half way to him before she stopped. Thoughts churned and facts aligned, and her heart pounded faster with each realization. Every question she'd asked, every conversation they'd had... every bit pointed to one fact. She almost couldn't breathe with the enormity of the truth.

She blinked, focusing again, and swallowed hard before stuttering out her question. "Doctor... wh-what was your father's name?"

He drew a breath, smiling as he released it. "Marnal."

_"Once the Council knew, Marnal accepted his punishment without argument and without plea, providing that he could bring his human lover and their child to Gallifrey."_

"Oh. My. God."

The library tilted and blurred, but before she lost her legs completely the Doctor was there, easing her back onto the ottoman to sit. He crouched in front of her, his hands resting against her hips, anxiety pinching around his eyes. "Are you still with me?"

Rose nodded, sucking in deep lungfuls of air. "Yeah. I'm good. I just... I hadn't expected this." Her heart rate finally found a more reasonable rhythm and Rose focused on the Doctor's face. He still looked the same to her — still amazing, still adorable — still the most incredibly unbelievable man she had ever or would ever know...

"Tell me what you're thinking."

She reached out a shaky hand and laid it against his cheek. His eyes shifted to the contact, and then back to her, and Rose smiled. "I'm thinking that I'm relieved... I'm... _happy_ for you."

"Why?" he asked, pulling back from the touch, sounding completely shocked by her words. "Why would you say that? Do you remember everything I said, Rose? About Marnal being ostracized... about the Council taking everything away from him? He was-was-was--" He stuttered over his words, like he always did when there was too much flying around in his brain to connect it all with something so archaic as speech. "_Punished_. They took his TARDIS. _This_ TARDIS. They took his lives!"

He shot straight up, and Rose's head snapped back to keep him in her sight. The Doctor strode away, back to the fireplace, his knuckles white as he gripped the mantle. He shot a look back at her. "How can you say you're happy? Why?"

Rose shook her head, keeping her emotions level despite the anger that tinged his voice. He didn't understand, and she would just have to _make_ him understand. "Doctor... the Council may have taken those things, but... it seems to me they couldn't take the one thing - the _two_ things - that meant the most to your father. Your mother. And _you."  
_  
He still stared, one eyebrow arched higher than the other, breathing hard. The Doctor tipped his head back, staring at the ornately carved the wall over the fireplace mantle. After a few moments, he closed his eyes and pressed his lips together, his Adam's Apple bobbing as he swallowed.

She waited until the electrical current that seemed to charge the air in the library dissipated before standing again. The initial shock was gone, and the image was so clear now. Rose walked to him, her feet silent on the carpet, until she stood within arm's reach of him without reaching out.

"You want to know why I'm happy?"

He nodded, but didn't look at her, didn't open his eyes.

"When you first told me about how Time Lords are created, and not born... how they are bred without mothers and fathers and raised for the sole purpose of _being_ a Time Lord... my heart broke. I only had my mum growing up, but I still had her. And I knew she loved me. I thought how awful it must have been to grow up without that, and I wished you could have had more."

As she talked, he lowered his chin and turned his head, opening his eyes to look at her.

"I'm happy, Doctor, because now I know you were loved. Your father didn't lose anything that wasn't completely made up for by gaining you."

"How do you know that?" His voice was nearly lost in the small space between them.

"Everything about you." She laid one hand on his arm, and pointed back toward the album on the couch. "They tell me. If your mother and father hadn't loved you, you wouldn't have wanted to rebel against the Council enough to have a family of your own."

He sucked in a sharp breath, and smiled. It was a hesitant smile, a distant smile... a smile almost of wonder. Without focusing on her, he spoke. "My father couldn't be a Time Lord anymore, and they didn't want him in the Citadel or the Academy. So, he became a laborer... a normal man. He made furniture." The Doctor chuckled softly. "I can remember his hands. They were _huge_... at least to me. Rough and calloused, and they always smelled of stain." He sniffed. "I used to sit in his workshop with him. I was maybe seven years old, before I went to be tested for Academy. He said it was my birthright to be tested... and if I passed the genetic exams... it was my birthright to be a Time Lord. He'd quiz me on Dimension Relativity and warp core drives until I could rattle off formulas without hesitation. I was considered one of the most brilliant students to join the Academy."

Rose smiled, deciding against her typical 'you think you're so brilliant' snarks. "Looks like he did a good job."

The Doctor nodded, but his attention didn't drift from whatever distant place it had slipped off to. "My mother was so beautiful, Rose. She had dark brown hair that she always wore in a braid and it fell all the way to her waist. And she used to sing... no matter what she was doing. Cleaning, cooking, just… walking… she sang."

Tears welled in her eyes, but only because her heart had swelled with so much love for him that she couldn't hold it in. She'd never seen this particular look in his eyes, like he had slipped into a memory that was so wonderful and so beautiful that it filled him, and overflowed to her.

"She used to travel with him all over the universe." His eyes shifted to her then, his smile hitching up just a little more. "Just like you."

Rose stepped closer to the Doctor, wanting to soak in some of the euphoria rolling off him. His hands slid beneath the loose, open front of his shirt she wore to rest at her waist, and his smile bubbled through her like champagne in her veins.

"What was her name?"

Holding his head high, he said his mother's name as if it were the most regal and important name to ever be heard. "Ann."

"S'beautiful." Rose slid her hands up to his shoulders to wrap her arms around his neck. She closed her eyes and let a low moan purr softly in her throat when he pulled her close and squeezed her tight. As she pulled back. she took his hand and walked back to the couch. "So, tell me how they met, your mum and dad."

The Doctor reclaimed his position in the corner of the couch, his arm across the back so Rose could settle in the space at his side. She sat sideways, with her legs pulled up beside her and her bent knees resting against his thigh and hip so she could watch the play of expressions across his face when he talked.

"My father was sent by the Council to observe some strange events in the timeline on Earth around the dawn of the 25th century. Medical advances were coming rapidly, progressing humanity forward too quickly. His job was to determine whether action was required by the Time Lord Council as no individual Time Lord was authorized to act on their own."

Rose chuckled, tilting her head sideways so she could rest it on his arm. "You wouldn't do well with that, would you? Checking with someone else before you save the day."

"No, not at all," the Doctor said with a grin. "Never was good at it, even when there was still a Time Lord Council to check with. Probably why they exiled me for a few years... but, _that's _a story for another day."

"Okay, so, he's sent to watch. How'd he meet your mum?"

The Doctor laughed and dropped his head back to rest on the high back of the couch. "You'll love this. And I'm sure your mother would have something to say about my family line corrupting young women throughout the galaxy." Rose waited, her curiosity piqued. He cleared his throat and looked at her. "She was a nun."

Rose's mouth fell open of its own free will, and she stared at him.

"Yep," he said with a loud pop of his 'p'. "Not _only _did my father make a human woman his lover - against every precedent and directive established by the Time Lord Council - but, he 'corrupted a woman of faith'. Of course, she was a nun of the New Dominican Congrative Alliance faith, and although celibacy was encouraged in their clergy, it was not an absolute mandate."

"Oh. My. God."

He grinned lopsided, turning just slightly so they faced each other more. "Seems that she worked in one of the hospitals he was observing, and she caught him 'observing' up close one evening. Being a pretentious _Time Lord_, he told her to be on her way and leave him to his work. She refused, demanding to know who he was. Even following him when he returned to the TARDIS, which, didn't look like a Police Public Call Box then. That's really my fault. Run in with the chameleon switch and a peanut butter and banana sandwich when I was a tot."

Rose nearly choked on her laugh, covering her mouth with her hand.

"I'll have you know it was _not _found to be amusing at the time." He tipped his chin down, arching his eyebrows. "I can remember quite clearly my mother arguing that if my father didn't let me play without guidance with the machinery, I wouldn't leave my lunch there for later. _He _argued, of course, that if I didn't play I wouldn't learn... and that I should be taking my meals in the kitchen, not the console room." He smiled as he told the story, so it obviously wasn't that heated of an argument.

"S'at why you're always fiddling with her? Fixin' all the things you broke when you were little?"

He poked a finger into the corner of his eye by his nose, rubbing gently. "Most likely, yes. I'm sure I inflicted more damage than anyone ever readily admitted to."

Rose sighed. She enjoyed just sitting with him, but hearing so much of who he was and who he had been had always seemed like something that wouldn't happen. He always kept everything so close to the vest. She loved that he enjoyed telling her, not just telling her because she pushed and demanded.

"So, my mother followed my father back to and right inside the TARDIS. I'm sure you can recall your initial reaction."

"I ran right back out."

"She didn't. She just told him he was impossible. Full denial." He cut his hand across the air, shaking his head. "No matter what he said, or did, she just kept telling him he was impossible and didn't exist. So, once the Council determined that nothing should be done that things would work themselves out, he left Earth. And took her with him. Just to prove her wrong."

"I'm guessing she believed him eventually."

"Eventually, yeah. I guess he didn't take well to being told first he didn't exist, and second being constantly knocked down from his all-mighty Time Lord mountaintop by a human of all creatures. She didn't give him an inch. A good match for him." The Doctor lowered his arm from the back of the couch and stroked his fingertips across her cheek, smiling. "Like someone else I know." He took a deep breath and his eyes roamed over her. "Have I mentioned how tempting you are wearing my shirt?" His long fingers tugged at the collar, revealing some of her shoulder, and skimmed down the side of her throat to send a small shiver through her.

"So..." She leaned into his touch, rubbing her cheek against his hand like a cat. "To fall in love with a human, I'm guessing your father wasn't a toe-the-line kind of Time Lord, either? Like father like son?"

"More like sins of the father visited on the son, I think. Taking a lover, let alone a _human _lover, wasn't the first time he'd pushed the limits of Time Lord propriety. He'd acted without their guidance or permission, he'd taken unsanctioned trips to planets and timelines they didn't feel the need to monitor because they were lesser races who had no effect - so the Time Lords believed - on the Universe as a whole."

Rose reached out to stroke her fingers through his hair, smiling when he turned into her hand and kissed her wrist. "No, I wouldn't call it a sin. It's wonderful. I love those things about you. All the things you say the Time Lords didn't approve of. I can't imagine you any other way. Even before... when I first met you. I can't..." She blinked, shaking her head as she tried to work out the words she wanted. "They did a good job, your mum and dad."

"Yeah?"

His insecurity always seemed so out of character to Rose. Here was a man who had saved worlds, changed and manipulated history, faced beasts and monsters, _demanded _authority... but sometimes, he just looked like a little lost boy unsure of what to do next.

"Yeah. They'd be proud. Very proud."

The fingers that had been stroking her throat curled behind her neck, lacing into her still-sleep-rumpled hair. His gaze settled on her lips, and with just that simple shift of his attention, Rose's heartbeat jumped. He urged her to move to him, and met her half way, his open mouth covering hers as his tongue slid along between her lips. Both his large, elegant hands held her, tilting her head to let him fill her mouth with his tongue. That glorious tongue that could do magic.

Rose shifting so she rose over him and they settled back into the corner of the couch, her hands curled into his lapel to support her weight. The Doctor's hands left her face to squeeze her hips and she straddled her leg across his lap, sitting on his thighs. His moan skimmed across her mouth as she took control of their position, gently rocking her hips against him. Long fingers slid over her bottom with a firm touch, pressing her harder against him.

He slid his mouth along her jaw and down her throat, his tongue soft and warm against her skin, until he reached the curved neckline of her pyjama tank. Breathing warm against the curve of her breasts, the Doctor tugged the material down, exposing more skin for his tongue to taste and his teeth to graze over. She braced her hands on the back of the couch on either side of his neck, throwing her head back as his mouth played over her skin.

With a shuddered breath, Rose forced herself to lean back, breaking the contact of his mouth to her breasts, and pushed her hair back from her face. The Doctor looked up at her, his lips glistening and damp, his tongue hovering, ready to taste her again.

"Wait..." She managed to say, even though her heart pounded like a caged bird and her breath came in short bursts.

"What?"

"I want to know more. I want to hear more."

"Right _now_?" As if emphasizing the point, he slid his hands beneath the ribbed material of her top, his hands - slightly cooler than her own, just enough to make her back arch - skimmed up her spine.

Rose instinctively rocked her body, eliciting a low rumble from the Doctor, his eyes threatening to close. She already ached, but she knew that if he stopped talking now, he might never broach the subject again and she wanted to know everything she could about him. "Yes." Her voice rasped and she cleared her throat softly. Rose curled her fingers around the cushion. She scooted back, sliding along his thighs until she sat near his knees and leaned down to look him in the eyes. "I want to hear more."

His hands rested on her legs and he slid them over the soft flannel to rest near her hips, his thumbs caressing the inside of her thighs. "What else do you want to know?"

Rose drew a breath, releasing it as she asked her next question. "So, you told me that Marnal — your dad — hid you from the Time Lord Council for years. Where did he hide you??

He tipped his chin up and indicated the expanse of the library with the movement of his head. "Here. In the TARDIS. His TARDIS. I was born here."

Rose jumped at a sudden sound behind her, and the Doctor flipped her onto the cushions, gaining his feet. He was half way across the library before she could catch her breath.


	3. Chapter 3

The Doctor reached the far corner of the library just as the bookshelves split and slid aside, Rose running up behind him to peer past his arm, watching the shifting of books and wood. In the space revealed appeared the door that Rose had seen a couple weeks before while nursing a bad cold on the library couch.

The last time she saw it, she had been much further away lying on the couch, and had only seen that it was a door that the TARDIS in the form of the blonde, blue-eyed child had disappeared into it to retrieve a storybook. Now, standing this close, she saw that it was actually a double door, the knobs meeting in the center. They were rich and dark, carved with images of suns and moons, animals and fairies, like a storybook picture carved into the wood.

"S'at room again," she said, pointing past him. "Remember?"

"Yesssss." The Doctor drew out the 's', his brow pulled down over his eyes as he studied the door. He reached into his suit for his screwdriver, waving the blue tip back and forth across the doorway. "More temporal residue. It's been put here from some other point in time." He mumbled more than spoke as he scanned the door, and looking at the tip of the screwdriver. He sucked in a deep breath before rotating on his heels to look at her. "I suppose the old girl is ready for us to see what she's hiding, hmmmm?"

Before she answered, he reached for the knobs and pushed the doors open, revealing the room beyond. Two steps into the room, the Doctor stopped and his hands dropped to his side.

Rose gasped, stepping around him to see the entire room.

There was no doubt the room belonged to a child... a somewhat messy child because the floor was scattered with toys and books and sketch pads with coloring pencils worn down to near nubs. Everything was blue in some shade or variation... the walls, the thick duvet on the bed, the carpet that covered the center of the floor, and the ceiling... the ceiling was a night sky complete with twinkling stars and a pink-yellow nebulus cloud. Rose stood in a bare spot on the floor and looked up, turning slowly. There was no end to the sky... she could have been standing in the center of a field in Chesham and the air in the room carried the scent of grass and evening.

"Doctor... this is beautiful," she whispered, suddenly feeling that the room deserved her reverence. She crouched down and picked up one of the sketch pads. The drawing was juvenile in its simplicity, but the colors were vivid and the paper indented where the artist had pushed the pencils hard into the pad.

Three people stood hand in hand. One... the father, if Rose had to guess... stood much taller than the others with wide shoulders and large hands. He was drawn to have yellow hair and a wide smile, and two hearts were drawn over his chest. Beside him was a woman wearing a green dress with long brown hair. A single heart was drawn for her, but it was large and took up just as much space as the father's two.

And between them was a little boy, his hair drawn with a white pencil. He held the hand of each adult, and his smile took up his entire face. Two hearts were drawn on his chest. Separate from the three, drawn in the corner, was a little girl with long blonde hair and dark blue eyes.

This was the Doctor's room.

When she looked up from the drawing, she sought the Doctor out and saw that he'd moved from the doorway to the bed. Draped across the foot of the bed was the same soft afghan Rose remembered the TARDIS giving her when she was sick. The Doctor picked it up and held it to his face, his eyes closed as he inhaled. With the blanket still held to his nose he sank down onto the small bed.

"You were a messy little boy," Rose said softly, walking over him, stepping carefully over the books and toys. She sat down beside him, close enough that she could lean her cheek against his arm and lay her hand on his leg.

He lowered the blanket, holding it bundled in his hands. "My mother was forever telling me to clean up, but I always thought there were more important things to do. And why put all my toys away if I'm just going to take them out again?" His voice was distant and rough, his eyes on the blanket. "She made this before I was born and I slept with it until the day we left the TARDIS."

A shuddered breath shook his body and he looked up, his gaze on the other side of the room. "We landed on Gallifrey and I remember being very cross because they wouldn't let me take some toy with me..." He shook his head. "I don't even remember what it was now. My mother told me I could play with it when we came home." Rose's eyes prickled with hot tears when she saw the moisture pooling in his dark brown eyes. "They never let us come back."

Rose wrapped her arm behind him, curling her other hand into the bend of his arm to hold him. She rested her cheek on his shoulder but tipped her head back to see his face. The smiles and bright gleam in his eyes from just minutes before were now replaced with a sadness that pulled at his features. "How old were you?"

He shook his head again. "Perhaps five? Six?"

"Why did your father decide to bring you back? He looked down at her, and she offered a smile, hoping he knew it was okay to keep talking. "He must have had some idea..."

The Doctor swallowed, closing his eyes slowly. He laid his hand on hers. "He wanted me to go to the Academy. He knew that the Council would be angry, but really didn't know what they would do to _him_. But, they couldn't deny my right to be trained as a Time Lord. I was a child of Gallifrey. It was my right, just like any child."

Rose set the sketch in his lap and his gaze shifted down. "I think we should hang this up, too. Or, at least, put it somewhere special. Who's this?" she asked, pointing out the girl in the corner. "Did you have a sister?"

"No," he answered, taking his specs from his pocket so he could examine the picture. "I had a brother, but not while we lived here. No, _that _is my imaginary friend. My father used to say it was a touch of the human in me to create an imaginary playmate when there was so much to do within the TARDIS to occupy my mind."

She smiled at the thought that the Doctor - A _Time Lord _who traveled the stars in a blue box - had an imaginary friend when he was a little boy. "Yeah? Cuz... she looks a _lot _like the TARDIS. You know, when she visits with me. Blonde hair, dark blue eyes... could be her."

"I never made the connection..." He said softly, studying the picture. "You told me, and I don't think I even remembered. I just thought..." He let the handing holding the sketchpad drop into his lap. The Doctor looked at Rose. "Why would she show herself to you now and not me?"

Rose shrugged. "Probably got her reasons."

He seemed to slip back into thought, staring at the drawing, but some of the strain had left his face, the lines around his eyes relaxing. Rose pulled back, but stayed beside him, picking up a small stuffed toy on the bed. It looked like a cross between a rhinoceros and a pelican, and was a deep purple color. A book sat on the bed behind the Doctor and she picked it up, smiling when she saw the title embossed in the leather.

"Look. Here's the book she read me. _Rumplestiltskin _."

"It was my favorite story. She used to read..." His voice trailed off again and he looked at the book. "I should have known then. Imaginary friends don't read books at the foot of your bed, do they?"

"How would you have known? Sounds like you didn't exactly have a bunch of other children hangin' 'round tellin' you how to act and how things were supposed to be. Maybe that's why she was a little girl. So you had a friend?"

"Maybe."

The Doctor stood and Rose scooted back further onto the bed, crossing her legs with the sketch pad and book in her lap. She watched him traverse the room slowly, stopping here and there to pick up a toy or a book, running his fingers along the edge of a shelf. The room was really huge, probably bigger than her mum's entire flat.

He stopped to pick up a small round toy on the shelf, and she smiled when his face lit up. With a slight touch, the entire toy exploded in color, taking on a brand new form in the palm of his hands. It was like a kaliedescope without the tube. "I used to _love_ this!" he declared, bounding on the balls of his feet. "I think it was the toy I wanted to take with me."

The Doctor played for several minutes, and Rose just watched. He was like a kid all over again, not that he wasn't often like a kid. It was engrained in his personality now.

"So," she said after a bit. "You didn't have a sister. Did you have any brothers?"

His head popped up and he slipped the magical changing ball into his pocket. Rose smiled, wondering how long it would be before she found him playing with the toy when he thought she wasn't looking. "Yes. He was born several years after me. After I'd gone on to Academy. Roderick. My father was hesitant to allow my mother to have another child."

"Why?"

"Having me was difficult for her." He ticked his head to the side before diverting his eyes away. "Probably one of the reasons Time Lords were discouraged from procreating, especially outside of Gallifrey. My mother conceived — quite unexpectedly, as you might imagine — but, the genetic coding for a Time Lord is pre-set for a very strictly monitored and guided growth pattern."

"Which means what, exactly?"

He came back across the room and dropped onto the bed with a hop, making the mattress bounce and Rose squeak as she tried to keep from toppling onto the floor. The Doctor leaned back, extending his legs with his ankles crossed, supporting his weight on his bent elbows. "In any species that procreates naturally, it's all done automatically. Zygotes divide into blastomeres. The blastocyst attaches to the endometrium." Rose pulled a face, grimacing. "But, when a Time Lord is Loomed, every stage of development is initiated by the nursery guardians. Nothing happens naturally."

"But, it did... obviously."

"_Well_, yeah... but not like anything you'd call _normal _. A human pregnancy is approximately nine months. In comparison, a loomed child remains in the Loom for--" He tipped his head back and forth, his lower lip protruding as he ran calculations in his head. "--the equivalent of three and a half years. Course, we also come out of the Loom with full cognitive, linguistic and motor skills developed."

Rose gasped. "Good God, please tell me your mother wasn't pregnant for _over_ _three years _."

"Nah. Just two."

"_What?_"

He shifted his weight onto one elbow and wagging a finger at her with the other hand. "No elephant jokes."

"You're telling me your mother was pregnant for _two years_."

He hummed an affirmative, nodding his head. "Mind you, even then, not like a human pregnancy. I was on slow cook." Rose groaned, and he grinned. "My father told me years later that he thought it was because the Time Lord DNA was dominant. Takes longer for a Time Lord to develop because of the Regenerative DNA coding and whatnot. Her human body didn't quite know how to handle it. Not that it was a particularly hard pregnancy, by what I hear. My father said you couldn't even _tell_ for a good ten or twelve months."

Rose stretched out on her side beside him. "Wasn't she worried? I mean, come 'round the tenth or eleventh month, I would've been wonderin'."

"By then, she'd gotten used to things being different with my dad. And he took care of her, him and the TARDIS. Still wasn't easy, and my father didn't want to put her at risk. But, she had Roderick without much fuss. He wasn't born with the Regenerative gene, so it was more a Gallifreyan/Human cross and didn't go along quite the same."

Rose shook her head, staring down at a star embroidered on the duvet they laid across. "Confusin', that's what it is. Human DNA, Gallifreyan DNA, Gallifreyan _but Time Lord_ DNA..." She looked up, and found the Doctor watching her. "What?"

He didn't answer right away, his gaze shifting over her face as one corner of his mouth ticked up in a small smile. "It's just... I never even considered telling anyone all the things I've just..." His smile widened.

She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Thank you for telling me."

With a huff, the Doctor rolled forward off the bed and stood, offering his hand to her. "What do you say we go have some tea and biscuits?"

Rose took his hand and let him pull her to her feet. "Sure. One more question, though."

"_Still_?" She nodded. "Okay, one more question."

"How is it that your father had a name, your brother had a name... even your wife and children had names... but you are just _The Doctor?_"


	4. Chapter 4

"Would you believe my mother had a secret fetish for physicians?"

Rose poured hot water into two mugs. "No. Not even remotely."

"My_ father_ had a secret fetish for physicians?"

"Doctor!"

"All right, all right. As far as I am aware, _neither_ of my parents had fetishes for anyone in the medical profession. If anything, I suppose it can be said my father had a thing for women in wimples."

"Stop it. Seriously." Rose carried the cups back to the table, setting one in front of him before she sat down. "You're not changing the subject."

The Doctor sighed, taking a bite of his chocolate biscuit. "All right. Fine. As you have so cleverly determined, my birth name is not The Doctor." He raised a finger, quieting her before she could ask her next question. "No, Rose. I am not going to tell you my name." He reached across the table and took her hand, turning it over so her palm was up, then he curled her hand in his and lifted it to his mouth to kiss her knuckles. "It probably sounds like avoidance, or that I just don't want to tell you, but I have my reasons. Valid reasons. And they're all to keep you safe."

"Are you sure it's not just because your name is…" She paused, trying to think of the worst name possible. "Narcissus, or something."

His jaw dropped. "Are you calling me _vain_?"

Rose lifted her cup of tea to her lips to hide her smile. "Hmmmm."

"Hmmmm? What does _that_ mean?" His expression transformed into shock, one eyebrow arching high over wide eyes.

Rose took a sip of her tea, and slid from her chair, returning to the counter to keep him from seeing her face. She was half way to the sink before his arms came around her and he lifted her off her feet. Rose squealed, clinging to his arms around her middle. They were both laughing by the time he set her down and turned her in his arms.

"So, I'm vain, am I?"

"With good reason," she teased, reaching up to ruffle his already rumpled and unruly hair. "You've got _great hair_ this time 'round."

He backed them up until they bumped the counter, and without missing a beat, the Doctor lifted her up and set her bottom on the counter edge, sliding his body between her legs. "That the only thing you like?"

"No." He was kissing her before she finished her answer, his fingers digging into her hips to pull her against him. Rose leaned back, setting her hands on the counter so she could see him but he couldn't quite reach her to kiss her again. "_But_, you are _still_ not avoiding the question, Doctor!"

"Answer's the same… I'm not telling you my name."

"Okay. Tell me why you're called _The Doctor_."

"It's not that interesting a story, Rose. Honestly." He pulled her closer to the edge, his arms sliding behind her to keep her against him. "This is _much _more interesting."

Rose wiggled and squirmed, laughing when his fingers tickled her sides, but managed to get free of his gangly arms and hopped down from the counter. When she was outside his reach, Rose stepped backwards, offering her most seductive smile as she ran the tip of her tongue over her lips. "Tell you what," she said, sliding his large shirt down off one shoulder to expose the mostly bare skin beneath. "Tell me why you're _The Doctor_, and I'll give you back your shirt."

"I rather like you in that shirt."

"Okay… tell me and I'll wear nothing _but_ your shirt."

His eyes darkened as they shifted down her body, and heat flushed over her skin just by his glance. "It was a nickname at first," he finally answered. "A taunt, really. I wasn't exactly the favored student at Academy. Everyone knew of my parentage, the Cardinals made no secret of their distaste in my muddied bloodlines, and I wasn't exactly the model example of stoicism and detachment."

Looked at him over her shoulder, Rose turned her back to him and slipped her arms free of the shirtsleeves. "Keep talking, Doctor."

His mouth was partially open, his eyes watching her as she worked off the shirt and removed the tank beneath without revealing a single, partial inch of skin. Rose was thankful now for all those times she had to change clothes in the front seat of Shireen's car because they were both late for work, or school, or someone's party.

"Um… right. Ah… nickname. Actually, it started with my friend." When he said 'friend', something in his voice changed, strained, and Rose looked back at him. His teeth clicked together and he swallowed. "Sorry. I just haven't thought of him in a very, _very_ long time." His eyes snapped back to her, and Rose held out her arm, dangling the now removed tank top off her fingertips. She dropped it on the floor before buttoning up the front of the shirt.

"You're not talking, Doctor."

He cleared his throat, his eyes on the dropped tank. "I had ideas to change things. Make things better, not just for us, but for everyone. All the species and planets we watched, sometimes just let die. I didn't understand why we couldn't do more. Fix things. So, my friend started calling me The Doctor… the Fixer." He shook his head. "It wasn't meant to be a… he didn't mean it like that. But, others started calling me Doctor in ridicule."

"Why would you use it as a name then?" She turned back around to face him when the shirt was buttoned just enough to cover her breasts while leaving plenty of cleavage.

He shrugged one shoulder, taking a step toward her. "They called me a revolutionary, a rebel, a _human-lover_. I supposed I _was_ all those things. And I didn't want to be anything else."

Rose took a step backward, not wanting to end the game quite yet. "Was it hard for you?"

The Doctor scowled, dipping his chin. "I suppose. I dealt with the Cardinals pushing me harder than anyone else, figured it made me the better student in the end. And the opinions of the other Initiates didn't matter to me. It was being away from my family that bothered me most. I was eight years old."

"Doctor," Rose said softly, waiting for his eyes to come back to her. Holding his gaze, she hooked her thumbs in the waistband of her pyjamas and slid them down her legs, bending forward enough to give him a quick view down the loose shirt.

The scowl was quickly replaced by heat and desire, and Rose's heart fluttered knowing she could do that to him. With her bare foot, Rose hooked the flannel bottoms with her toes and kicked them aside, standing now in just the loose, blue cotton shirt that just cleared the top of her thighs.

"S'at why you took Susan away?" she asked, taking one more step back until she reached the kitchen archway leaning into the hall. Rose tucked her hands behind her and raised one knee to set her bare foot against the wall. "So she wouldn't go through that?"

The Doctor took a step toward her, his eyes on her legs and not her face. Heavy eyelids hooded his gaze, and as he walked, he unbuttoned the front of his suit jacket. "Lorelei asked me to take her away. To show her where she came from. The people she belonged to."

He shrugged off the jacket and tossed it on a kitchen chair as he passed. He still wore the open-neck tee shirt he'd worn to the Games that exposed his neck and showed just enough chest hair to made her blood hum. By the time he reached her, Rose's breath caught in her chest in tiny gasps. He invaded her space, pressed her body against the wall with his own, and hooked his hand behind her knee to level it with his slim hips.

He used the long index finger of his other hand to skim her skin along the open collar of his shirt she wore. Rose's eyes fluttered as his fingertip followed the upper curve of her breast to the valley between. The Doctor bent his head and brushed his nose along her neck, his breath on her skin. His hair tickled her cheek and his tongue smoothed along the column of her throat, down her breastbone until he reached the 'v' of the shirt. The hand he had hooked behind her knee slid up her thigh until it pushed the tail of the shirt over her hips, his fingertips pressing into her bottom.

"Rose," he said against her breasts, and the sound of her name vibrated through her. "I'll tell you more, I swear. But right now…" His fingers released the next button of the shirt. He raised his head and looked into her eyes. "I want to be inside you."

Rose shuddered, a thrust of arousal snapping through her.

The Doctor bent his knees and effortlessly lifted her off the floor. Rose wrapped her legs around him, hanging on to his shoulders as he carried her from the kitchen, his mouth hot against her throat as he walked. When they reached the bedroom, he set his knee on the bed and laid her back, moving with her so he hovered over her.

"Rose," he said roughly, and she felt herself shake beneath the intensity of his gaze. "What you do to me…" He left the phrase incomplete, suspending his weight on one arm as he unbuttoned the shirt with the other. With the release of each button, Rose's breath came faster and her pulse pounded at the base of her throat.

His knuckles grazed over her breasts and down her stomach, teasing her navel before brushing the juncture of her thighs. She groaned, curling her fingers into his shoulders as he leaned in and drifted his open mouth over her abdomen, lower and lower until his breath stirred tight curls, making her gasp.

The Doctor scooted backwards, his tongue trailing a line from where her inner thigh met her body to the inside of her knee. It was all Rose could do to keep from crying out as her senses sparked and came alive. He set one foot on the floor, the other knee still resting on the bed, and straightened. With his dark gaze watching her, the Doctor reached behind his neck and pulled the dark cotton shirt off over his head.

Rose started to sit up and slide his shirt off her arms. "No," he said, not sharply but stern enough that she stopped. "Leave it on."

She lay back again, letting her fingers brush along the open edges of the shirt, opening it enough to expose her breasts and body. He watched her and inhaled a deep breath, swallowing as his eyes darkened more. Not looking away from her, he unbuckled his belt and unfastened his trousers, the sound of the zipper mingling with Rose's panted breaths. By the time he stood and let the trousers drop, Rose was dizzy, unable to lie still.

He knelt on the bed again, his eyes on her face as he gently pushed her legs apart, his hands on the inside of her knees. Only when he leaned in and his mouth touched her skin did he close his eyes as he slowly worked his way up the inside of her thigh. His teeth grazed slightly, his tongue tasted and his lips kissed, sucking gently.

His mouth reached her heat, but as much as Rose's instincts were to close her eyes and let the sensations take over, she couldn't look away. The Doctor's hands slid beneath her bottom, lifting her a tiny degree off the bed, and his thumbs stroked sensitive skin as his breath whispered over her. He paused and inhaled, and Rose felt a spasm of need ripple through her. She was nearly orgasmic and he hadn't fully touched her yet!

Then the tip of his tongue stroked over her clitoris and she cried out, pushing reactively against him and he latched onto her with his open mouth. Tears burned her eyes, but only because of the overwhelming ecstasy of his touch. His tongue pressed against her, rolling and tasting, and he hummed softly. Rose couldn't breathe and couldn't think, but she couldn't look away. His gaze darted up her body, meeting her stare, and he smiled against her.

His hand slid from beneath her, and with his tongue licking her with just enough pressure to sent tiny bolts of electricity through with each pass, he pushed a finger inside her.

She shattered, a devastating orgasm gripping her and she curled her fingers into the bedcovers just to keep herself from flying off the bed. He never took his mouth away, stroking and sucking until the spasms eased, leaving her limp and gasping.

The Doctor rose over her again, and took his finger from inside her to draw it into his own mouth, sucking at it just as he had the jam from his fingers at the Weber's house.

A shudder moved through Rose, and she had to swallow against the dry desert in her throat. "Oh, god…" she whispered. "Doctor."

His body shifted along hers, each point of contact tingling in the aftermath of her orgasm. In one swift act, he thrust inside her and covered her mouth with an open kiss, his tongue invading her and she groan, her body arching against him. His hands found hers and he laced their fingers together, drawing her arms higher so her hands rested on the mattress beside her head, nearly immobilizing her as he set a steady, forceful rhythm. Rose's fingers curled tighter as her body tensed again, already on the verge of another climax.

His tongue filled her mouth, and tasted like champagne, the remnants of her own arousal mingling with the taste of the Doctor. She gasped against his mouth, her breath hitching with each push of his hips against her. The Doctor left her mouth, burying his face against her throat, a low groan rumbling from his chest and vibrating through his lips. Words she didn't understand and couldn't comprehend laced his sounds of anticipation.

Her breasts bounced with each thrust, brushing her nipples against the sparse hair on his chest, and the sensation was enough alone to make her want to scream. Rose drew up her knees and the angle changed, and she _did_ scream… his name echoing off the walls.

His body shook over her, and she saw the ripple and twist of his back and shoulder muscles as he tried to keep the pace. Everything coiled, tightened, and her skin flushed with cold heat from her throat to their joined bodies. He thrust harder, the bed creaking beneath them and Rose squeezed his hands, her lungs burning as she tried to fill them with precious air.

"Doctor!" she screamed, and she shattered around him.

He grunted against her breast, continuing to pump his hips as the orgasm rolled through her. It was a sweet conflict between never wanting the overwhelming sensations to stop, and thinking she might die if they didn't because her mind and body was on overload.

The Doctor rose over her, his hands still pinning hers to the bed and looked down at her, his expression twisted in sweet ecstasy. Sweat glistened on his forehead, clinging to his brown hair. Rose arched her back, screaming again because she couldn't take the bolts of energy pulsing through her.

With one hard thrust, he pushed into her and stilled, his eyes closing as a spasm shook his body. He moved a fraction, only to push into her again, a small groan escaping his lips before he finally released her hands and his weight collapsed on her. They both were slick with sweat, panting for breath. She felt her heart pounding against his cheek where he'd rested on her breast, and his double hearts thundered through his ribs.

Only when they both were breathing somewhat normally did the Doctor turn his head and flutter a kiss across the swell of her breasts. He raised his head and looked at her, a satisfied and somewhat pleased grin on his lips.

"Do you need to get up?" he asked.

Rose shook her head. "I don't think I could walk right now if my life depended on it."

He laughed softly. "Neither could I."

The Doctor leaned across her and found an edge to the bed duvet, swinging it over her legs. But, he didn't lie beside her. Instead, he scooted further down the bed and laid his head on her stomach, using her body as his pillow. His fingers danced over her skin, sending another jolt through her, and Rose laced her fingers into his hair.

"You'll be with me forever, Rose," he said softly, his face turned away from her so she couldn't see his eyes. He kissed her stomach. "Forever."

Rose combed her finger through his damp hair. Before she could respond, he took in a deep breath and his entire body relaxed. Within moments, his deep breathing told her he'd already drifted to sleep. Rarely did he sleep when they shared the bed, and if he did fall asleep with her he was never asleep when she woke up. He might be beside her, but never asleep.

She let her head rest on the bed, still stroking his hair. Rose stared up at the ceiling, a smile ghosting over her lips.

"I love you."

He drew a deep breath in his sleep, but didn't move otherwise.

When the Doctor woke, he lifted his head from her stomach to lean over her, looking into her sleeping face. Rose was deep in the kind of sleep that only came with complete satiation, a soft smile bowing her lips. He couldn't help the wide grin of pride in knowing he'd left the smile on her face.

He shifted along beside her, and with just the slightest nudge of encouragement, Rose turned onto her side to nuzzle her nose against his chest, humming softly. He tugged the blanket higher around them and reached for two pillows to support their heads.

Lying in the dim light of the bedroom, the Doctor studied her. Her features were relaxed, her cheeks flushed slightly with sleep. The Doctor stroked her cheek with his fingertips and smoothed over the softness of her lips. Her breath warmed his skin and she responded to his touch even in her sleep, parting her lips. He wrapped her in his arms, pulling her against him to tuck her head beneath his chin.

He kissed her hair and rubbed his cheek against her own before stilling his lips near her ear. She inhaled softly, rolling tighter into him, her hands slipping over his side so her arm draped over him. As softly as possible, he closed his eyes and whispered a name that had not crossed his lips in nearly nine centuries.

_If you want to know just how much of my 'explanation' is canon, how much is canon-just-slightly-bent-to-my-will, or how much is fanon - you are welcome to visit my LiveJournal at tardislullabye./17364.html for the entry that explains everything. I'll tell you what is canon, how I used it, what is bent, what is totally made up - and where I dropped hints to all these final answers. Enjoy!_


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